List Lurker: 03-12-10

While you were busy hitting the delete key, I was busy living vicariously as a lonely list lurker.  Here's a quick look at what you might have missed on the various cycling list-serves this week...

First off, one of the common trends on every list-serve this time of year is race registration.  So here's a quick rundown of what events are open and where they can be found:

• The Wilmington Training Series continues this Sunday up in Delaware.  Registration is open.
• Next week brings the opening race of the GamJams Cat 3 Cup p/b Mountain Khakis.  There are still slots left in the 540 Cycling Vint Hill Classic.
• The Union Grove Road Race will be held up in Pennsylvania on March 27.  Registration opens on March 15.
• Jefferson Cup still has a few open slots left in Womens' and Masters' categories.
• Another Cat 3 Cup event, the Downtown Smithfield HAMmer Fest will be held on April 3rd.
• If you are looking for some hills, you can give the Morgantown Road Race a try on April 3rd.  Registration is open now.
• The Tour of Walkersville will be held on April 10th and still has some openings.
• The Tyson's Corner Circuit Race will be held the next day, April 11th, and also has a few openings.
• The RGS Title Chantilly Criterium will be held on April 17th.  Registration will open on March 17th at 9:00 a.m.
• The Wintergreen Ascent will be held on May 1st.  Registration is now open.

Besides race registration announcements, only one item really stuck out this week on the MABRA List-serve: 

• Sonja Evers will be presenting a Female Bike Fit clinic on Wednesday, March 17th from 6:30-8:00 p.m. at Sports and Spinal Physical Therapy in Northwest DC.  There is no fee to attend, but RSVP's should be sent to this address.

Over in the world of the Virginia Cycling Association, there were two notable items:

• Track cycling is a go!  The owners of the Southside Speedway have committed to opening the track to bikes starting on April 20th.  They will host events on four consecutive Tuesday nights starting on April 20th.  Ask your questions and make your plans to give track racing a shot.
• Finally, we now have a "GamJams Lawyer of the Week!"  A thread got started about folks not wearing their helmets at USA Cycling events when one official reminded Virginians that helmets must be worn "at all times when participating."  This led to the question "what does 'participating' mean?"  (That depends on what the meaning of 'is' is right?).  This led someone to cry "is there a lawyer in the house?"  Now we all know that you can't swing a dead cat in Northern Virginia without getting sued by an animal rights lawyer, right?  So, enter Edward J. McNelis III, GamJams Lawyer of the Week.  (Seriously, I'm now his biggest fan!)  He wrote:

Dear VA Cycling Community,

Thank you for you the invitation to weigh in on this issue as retained counsel for VA Cycling.  I approve of the helmet provision and support Bill Collin's right to berate riders who violate this rule.  I cannot, however condone riders wearing cargo shorts and compression tights (stylish or not) in public during VA Cycling events.  Such conduct tends to reinforce negative stereotypes bout cyclists as geeks and social misfits like Dan King.  Now, to whom should I send my $1,500 bill?

Mr McNelis, I salute you, your common sense, and your sense of fashion.  I hereby promise only to wear my compression tights with my hip hugger shorts from now on!  Thank you for your service to the cause.

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Got any comments, interpretations, re-interpretations, or mis-interprations?  Send them to me; I've got nothing better to do than to sit in my darkened room and live vicariously as a list-lurker...

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Gus Grissom races for Team GamJams Racing, teaches Greek and Latin at DeMatha Catholic High School, and writes a dissertation in his spare time.  He compiles this column strictly for fortune and glory.