GamJams.net: Where Mid-Atlantic bike racers roll

How to not commute like a wussy

[For the Not like a wussy series, we don't tap mere experts to make valued contributions. We invite the World's Leading Authorities within each particular domain. Nowhere is that more true than in today's contribution, from Jim McNeely on commuting. The Rouleur's knowledge of the subject is legendary, showing up as essays on Bike Trail Guys (BTGs) with a frequency and intensity rivaled only by his interval workouts during cross season. Enjoy.]

How to not commute like a wussy
by Jim McNeely, Squadra Coppi / IM Saab

Mike asked me to write an article on how not to commute like a wussy.  That should have been easy but when I started it, the thing began to come out like a preachy, smarmy bit written by some overzealous bike advocate.  Ick!  So instead of writing that, I decided to tell you all how to commute like a wussy.  If you’re going to be bad, might as well shoot for perfection, right?

First, only Boy Scouts need to be prepared.  So strip your bike down to the bare basics.  Ditch the reliable Conti Gatorskins in favor of slightly lighter Vittoria Evo.  Did Cipo race with a seat bag?  No!  So ditch that too.  Your boss will totally understand when you get to work an hour late because you had to walk from Silver Spring in your Sidis, and that foot pain will go away in a couple months, trust me on that.  Other things you can leave at home include a tube, minipump, patch kit (you’ll never have a multi-flat day on the roads around here, I assure you), a good multi-tool, and a tire lever.   

Make sure to ride your race bike at all times, even in bad weather.  Your ‘cross bike and fixie conversion, and that old MTB with slicks, are “practical” which is a synonym Bicycling magazine uses for ‘uncool.”  They have eyelets, lots of room to spread out, a relatively upright position… they scream “not a racer.”  You definitely don’t want to be spending a couple hours a day on one of them, five days a week. And fenders?  Don’t even think about fenders, not even the inexpensive, slick little SKS Race Blade clip-ons.  Wet butts are cool – just ask any two year-old.  

If you see any other commuters with a mechanical, even cute, single commuters, don’t bother stopping to help.  Did Lance stop to help Beloki?  Hells no.  And you won’t stop either.  I don’t care if it’s Jennifer Anniston on her Colnago Extreme Power.  A racer just doesn’t stoop to being a good Samaritan, and Jennifer will understand that.

How to not promote a race like a wussy

[There are 27,000 results in Google for "bike race promoter." Of these, 16,200 also contain the word "thankless." That seems about right. Thank the stars for folks like Karen Hanson (Team Rostello p/b Fiorucci), one of the Mid-Atlantic's most vaunted promoters, who suffers for months so that we may do the same for but an hour. Here is Karen's contribution to the Not like a wussy series on GamJams.]

How to not promote a race like a wussy
by Karen Hanson, Team Rostello presented by Fiorucci

Race promotion is one of those things that every cyclist should be forced to do at least once.  Everyone THINKS they know what is entailed, but its shocking how few cyclists, even the long term ones have a clue about rules and why races are run the way they are run.

The first rule of thumb is to come up with a battle plan.  The first rule of war is to have a goal for WHY IN THE HELL YOU ARE DOING THIS…  It certainly isn’t for the money, because you most probably make more money at your real job.  And if you are me, you do this for free.   I do it because we have to promote a BAR race for our association and to be a club in good standing with USA Cycling.  The race we put on at Ft Lee is a labor of love, as a military brat to give something back to the ARMY, and those who serve. Oh yeah, I also do this because I really love cycling, and want to do what I can to help the sport. 

Now that you know why you are doing it, you have to have a plan and a schedule. I start my planning a year in advance. Yes, it takes that long.  Micky Rooney and Julie Garland could put on a show in a weekend,  bike races that are well run take longer than that. After you have a plan, you have to have a goal.  My goal is to put on a SAFE race.  Then a fair race, and a top notch race.  Safety is job one.   
 

The plan:

1. Get approval from the location to have the race.
2. Get approval from the local police and DOT to have it in that location. You need to suck up to the police and make the arrangements for the police you will need, for how long and at what rate.  Do it well in advance and plan that the cost will go up. A nice token of appreciation, doesn’t hurt, either.
3. We have a meeting in Nov. in our association to schedule races.  You probably have a similar meeting.  Race dates are precious things,  the earlier you get your date scheduled, the less chance that you will have to go back and re-do 1. and 2. You will probably want to make sure that there are no competing races on your date in a nearby state.  Sometimes it happens and there is nothing you can do about it, but you don’t want to have your race against a very popular race that the people you are trying to draw are sure to go to.
4. You need to get your flier and permits approved. All of the forms are on USA Cycling.ORG, but I bet your local permit coordinator can give you a hand.  The earlier you get this step done, the better.  There are fines that escalate the closer you get to your race.  (Plus, haven’t you noticed that the races that have the flier come out late tend to be not well run?)
5. You need to decide if you need to make money on this race. I’m not kidding.  I have the luxury of not needing to make money on our races. But if you start out with that premise in mind, you will lose money. Guaranteed.  Things always cost more than you think they will.  Look at your club’s budget and decide worst case scenario how much money your club can afford to loose.  If the answer is zero, you may want to put on a time trial vs. a road race.  Clubs have gone under putting on road races.  Seriously.
6. From day one you have to line up your sponsors.  People think that money and prizes for cycling fall from the sky.  They don’t.  You need to be creative.  One year I ate cereal by the case to get coupons for copies of Breaking Away to give the junior riders.  Think outside the box. Wherever you are, be thinking, can I snag a prize from here?  It takes me over a year to get everything for our races, and trust me, come race time, I’m still scrambling.  You can’t put this off.
7. And while you are lining up sponsors, be thinking of how you are going to thank them.   I have BEGGED riders to send a note or an email after the race .  Want a sponsor to donate again?  Make sure that a rider or two writes them and thanks them. Sponsors are like gold, make sure they get a bit of polish and thanks for their bucks or stuff.
8. Do you have enough team members to cover all the jobs that need doing?  Plan that half the people in your club or less will actually do the job they were assigned.  Start courting volunteers early, and again, think outside the box. You may want to give a free entry or two to someone who can bring you volunteers. No volunteers, no race.  And don’t forget to polish your volunteers, too.  You need them for the next time you do this…People need to know exactly what their job is, why it is important, and how long they will be needed.  And you have to plan on the niceties of life, like feeding them, watering them and letting them go to the bathroom.  Yes, they need to do that.
9. Have you actually PROMOTED your race?  You can email the various lists, put fliers on vehicles at races, in bike shops, etc… Don’t assume that just because your race is on the calendar that people will come.   You need to remind them, again, and again and again.  
10. Talk to your chief ref and make sure that he/she is happy with you.  Your officials will do everything they can to make your race be a success.  Anything you can work out prior to race day will help you out.  They may need to come inspect your course, plan where your course marshals will be, etc…  If they have any special needs, you should move heaven and earth to get them for them.  Officials make our races happen.
11. Are there homes or businesses near your race that will be affected?  If so, a little pre-race good will will go a long way.  Make friends, not enemies.  Unless you don’t want to have your race, or any race there in the future.
12. Rainbow Racing gives USA Cycling a discount on race numbers.  Its on the USA Cycling website.  You should order your race numbers at least 8 weeks in advance in case there are any errors.  And order extra pins while you are at it, people eat pins. I swear it.
13. Make a race kit.  I have mine in one of those Rubbermade tubs.  In it are extra boxes of pins, staplers, note pads, pens,  duct tape, marking paint, flagmen vests and flags, a medical kit, toilet paper by the case and garbage bags.  You will never remember all this stuff.  So make a kit in advance, and keep it stocked for the future.  You never know what you will need.  Oh, and pop up tents, chairs and if you have a generator… you need it all.  Probably more than one.      
14. If you are accepting race day registration, you had better plan on some sort of money control.  Money does disappear and you don’t want it to be on your watch.
15. You probably need prize control, too.  I regularly have a thousand dollars or more in prizes.  You’d be surprised at the people who will dip their fingers into your prizes and walk off with them.  We have a dedicated prize person, and the racers sign for their prizes.  Anything that is not picked up, is a prize for next year.
16. Oh, do you have bathrooms? How many?  Who is going to check them and make sure that they are usable during the day and replace things like toilet paper? If you don’t have enough bathrooms, in convenient places, your racers will find alternative places to go.  If you want that race site again, you better think about this.  My book, four potties are the MINIMUM.
17. Run your volunteers thru the registration process before the race..  On the job training just stresses people out and makes registration a nightmare.   If you can have all the forms printed out and matched with the race numbers before race day, good for you.  Do it.  Registration will go much smoother.
18. I always hate to think about it, but what is your medical plan? Will you have an ambulance on site?  Or a race doctor, nurse or EMT?  If not, how long will it take to get one to the race site if something bad happens?  You had better know in advance.  Crashes are a fact of life racing, and prompt care can save a rider’s life.
19. After the race, get the results up and to USA Cycling pronto.  Many racers don’t stay around, but they want to know who won.  And they want their results to count.  You owe them that courtesy. When you send out the results, thank the participants, the venue, the sponsors and your volunteers.  

The week before a race I’m promoting I go into what I affectionately call “psycho-bitch mode.”  If you promote a race, you probably will, too. The closer you get to race day, the more crazy emails you will get from people who are sure that they know far more than you about how you should promote your race. I try to have some canned responses so that I am not spending too much time answering the same questions over and over again.  I also try to remember that emails are a very impersonal mode of communication, and that sometimes people leave off certain “niceities” that you would use in in-person communication.   Getting into a war of words is futile.  Trust me.  Forget what people say in an email to you. They will. 

The last words on how not to promote a race like a wussy… thick skin.  As a cyclist we are used to pain and suffering, with the occasional win. Out of 10 people that say something untoward, one will thank you.  It's like that occasional win.  One thank you makes it all worthwhile.  Remember that.  Especially when you are racing.  Your one thank you may be the one that keeps someone promoting that race you love.

How to not corner like a wussy

[Davis Phinney said that cornering well is free speed. After two consecutive years of racing Speed Week and the USA Crits series, Jared Nieters (Haymarket Bicycles p/b Trakkers) is inclined to believe him. Jared shares his lessons from the twisting trenches below, in the lastest installment of the "Not like a wussy" series on GamJams.]

How to not corner like a wussy
by Jared Nieters, Haymarket Bicycles p/b Trakkers

In 2008 I learned to corner at what Gonzalo Escobar called "Crit School."  We sent a team down to USA Crits SpeedWeek, and it was a trial by fire.  At first, (besides the blistering speeds) we had some trouble with the aggressive riding and hard lines through the corners, but we learned some lessons, and racing has been different ever since.  In the end, I have found that guys who can corner well find themselves off the front, and guys who can't corner well find themselves on YouGotDropped.

1. Pick any speed, as long as it's fast.
Cornering properly begins before you even start leaning the bike.  First, it is important to enter the turn at a speed you think you can maintain throughout the entire corner, without losing control.  Once you begin the corner, it is best not to change your speed.  Your head should be up, and you should be looking through the corner, past the exit.  If you're a little nervous in the corner and you're not sure how fast you can take it, just maintain the same distance between you and the rider in front of you throughout the corner.  Additionally, to ride a good and safe line, use your peripheral vision and maintain a constant distance between you and the rider to your inside.

2. Body position.
When you begin to lean the bike, it is important to have your body properly positioned on the bike.  The outside pedal should be down, bearing most of your weight.  Putting your hands in the drops and lowering your chest toward the top tube lowers your center of gravity and allows you to take the turn faster.  Also, try to center your weight (fore and aft) on the bike.  Finally, your inside knee should be tucked in tight to the top tube.  Dragging a knee looks cool in MotoGP, but in cycling, keeping it tucked in works better.

3. Using corners to improve your position.
There are a few little tricks you can apply in the turns to take them faster.  Typically, people slow more than they need to before the corner.  You can take advantage of that by allowing a very small gap to open in front of you shortly before the turn (we're only talking a 6 to 7 foot gap), and closing the gap through the corner.  Time it right, and you'll already being going faster when everyone else sprints out of the corner.  Keep in mind that if the other riders are cornering hard, you'll exit that turn with that 6 to 7 foot gap and you'll be sprinting.

Nervy riders can also move up in corners.  Most pelotons leave small lanes on the inside and outside of the main line.  Ride a little faster in those lanes, and you can typically move up a few spots.  This might require you to take a late- or early-apex line in order to avoid the group's traditional outside-inside-outside line, but if there aren't riders there, you can move far up the group.  But beware, this tactic can bite you in the rear if the lane disappears and you have to slow down, so you should spend a few laps trying to determine whether the lanes exist. 

4. Tools of the turning trade.
Additionally, equipment can make a difference.  Good wheels and tires are a significant advantage.  The right equipment is debatable, but the bottom line is that you need to know what your equipment can do, and have complete confidence in it. I love my Mavic Cosmic Carbones with Michelin Pro3 Race tires,  inflated to about 110 lbs.  I use this set-up in nearly every criterium, and the more I race them, the more my confidence in them increases.

5. Cornering confidence is a game-changer.
It's one thing to know how to corner, but the next step is knowing you know how.  In addition to confidence in your equipment, it really helps to have just plain confidence. Racers who are comfortable in the curves genuinely look forward to races with more corners, preferably close to the finish.  (They also don't mind a little rain or rough pavement thrown in the mix).  Riding through the turns aggressively and with purpose will allow you to take advantage of the corners, and not just survive them.

Cornering is particularly important in the Mid-Atlantic.  We have a ton of criterium races so navigating the turns well can be the difference between success and failure on a weekly basis.  Stay relaxed, be properly positioned, and look all the way through the corners.  If you don't finish at the front, it won't be because you couldn't make it through turn four well enough.

How to not ride an indoor trainer like a wussy

[Last season, Joshua Goyet's excellent "Tour de Garage" series provided some fresh workouts and added motivation to many cyclists' winter training routines. This installment of "Not like a wussy" keeps the focus on the indoor training ride, where the principal wussy-like offense is simply staying off the trainer altogether, and waiting for the chance to get outdoors.]

How to not ride an indoor trainer like a wussy
by Joshua Goyet, Virginia Beach Wheelmen

As the weather turns bleak, and the cyclocross season winding down, it becomes tougher and tougher to force yourself to ride outdoors.  The back up plan is usually endless miles on an indoor trainer.

There are many ways to accomplish the goals of off-season fitness on a trainer, none of which require monotonous miles after miles after miles.  This type of indoor training is sure to have a negative affect on mind and will likely kill any motivation you may have had.  Here are a few pointers:

1. Break your workout into smaller time intervals.  It is much easier for your body to accept the fact that you have a 5-minute interval to complete rather than focusing on an hour and half ride.  You would be surprised how quickly the time goes by.  Start with a 10-minute warm up.  Next perform 3 sets of 1-minute, 1-legged efforts.  Next perform 5 sets of 2-minute threshold efforts with 2-minutes rest in between.  Next perform 3 sets of 5-minute threshold efforts with 2 minutes rest in between.  Finally finish with a 10-minute warm down.  This example will take you at least on hour and 10 minutes and you never have to focus on more then 5 minutes at a time (except for the warm-up and warm-down).
   
   
2. Ride with a group.  Just like riding outdoors, groups make you do the workout.  Your motivation level will be high and the time will fly by.  Also with groups you can challenge each other.  A good workout is to use a Round-Robin style format.  Decide the limitations of workout (HR max, power outputs, gearing, etc…) and let each rider challenge the others by coming up with an interval segment that matches the limitations set.  This will allow everyone to be involved and push the group.  Its just like leading the pace line.
   
   
3. Break the workout into segments.  There is no need to get stuck with one indoor workout.  Develop “interval segments”.  These segments should focus on specific goals.  We could use the example from above.  The one-legged intervals are one segment, the 2-minute intervals are another segment, and the 5-minute intervals are the third segment.  If you develop enough of these segments, you can always put together a good workout by putting these segments together.  Each workout should consist of 2 to 5 segments depending on their length.
   
   
4. Focus on something other than time.  Heart rate and power output is great for this.  Sometimes you need to use the trainer for base miles.  If this is the case you should still break down your intervals.  During these longer, base building intervals I focus on my heart rate.  I let my heart rate get up to 150 then attempt to keep it there for the duration of the interval.  Another trick for these long rides is let your interval time decrease throughout the workout.  So if you start with a 20-minute interval with a 2-minute rest your next interval should be 15 minutes.  Then you can do a 12-minute effort followed by a 10-minute one.  As you count down you began to look forward to the next shorter one and before you know it you just did 2 hours on the trainer.
   
   
5. Don’t be afraid to get off the bike.  Whether or not you have a home gym, you can make these workouts part of a bigger workout.  Incorporate some strength work, like body weight squats, push-ups, sit-ups and pull-ups.  Be creative and don’t focus as much on bike time, focus on workout time.

Along with these pointers, most people also find it useful to listen to music, watch TV or maybe even read a book.  Those are good distractions that can help you push out the miles on some of those long days.  Whatever you do and however you do it is important to do it in a manner that will not burn you out before the start of the season.

How to not attack like a wussy: Part 3 - How to make the break stick

[Attacking. It's the only way bike races are won, yet how and when to do it are among the most elusive skills. Unless you race for Battley Harley-Davidson, anyway. They pelt competitors from a ceaseless hail of attacks, as if the black skies opened up and into a torrential painstorm. They attack so hard that the course climbs into the sag wagon. They attack so fiercely that that Chuck Norris is rumored to be in negotiations with the team, offering to trade his roundhouse kick for their VO2 max. They attack while the early bird is dead asleep, and after the fat lady has sung.

This installment of Not Like a Wussy is attacked by three members of the Battley Harley-Davidson team: Chuck Hutcheson, Russ Langley and Dave Fuentes. See Part 1 here and Part 2 here.]

How to not attack like a wussy
Part 3: How to make the break stick
by Dave Fuentes, Battley Harley-Davidson p/b Sonoma

When I was asked to contribute to the article, I thought to myself "What do I know about making a break stick?"  Then it hit me. It could be described in one word "Commit".

What does that mean?  I have been in my fair share of breaks. Some go on to be the race winning move, some are to set up the counter, and some are just for show to see who wants to "play" that particular day. With the exception of the last one, I have always had one goal in mind, which is to better my odds to win the race.

When you line up for a race, look around and observe your rivals for the day. You might see a field of 30 riders show up for a hot, July industrial park crit, or 100 riders in a March Road Race. The one thing that should stick out is the fact that there is only 1 person that will win the race. Why can't it be you?

I know that there are a lot of riders that fancy them selves as "sprinters", but I think the most successful riders are going to be the ones that are more versatile. When you are racing, you want to be part of the race. Isn't that why your out there? If you want to pay $25 to sit behind a bunch of guys and try and sprint at the end of an hour, hell, give me the money and I'll let you sit on my wheel and sprint after an hour at the point. I promise to let you win.

When you're out there racing, you want to test your personal limits. Being in a break is the best way to be a "factor in the race". I don't want to get into the whole dynamic of team tactics, heart rate, threshold, type of course, etc, but I will try and break it down as simple as possible.

You're racing and all of a sudden, the pack slows down. You decide to attack and now you're off the front on your own. "Shit, I didn't mean to do that" is what you might be thinking. Now is your time to be part of the race. You should commit to your attack and get into the mind set that you can go this alone if you have to. If riders bridge up to you, great! They should all be in the mind set of making the break stick. This requires the commitment from everyone. Your pulls should be equal in length, allowing enough time for those who just pulled to recover a bit before their next turn. Don't kill it and try and crush the break with super hard pulls. You will only succeed in dropping valuable HP off the back or, in most cases, scaring your breakaway companions into not working because they might not be as strong as you. If you're really that strong, you should hold your cards close to you, and play that "crushing move" close to the end once the break is established. The ideal break should be 3-5 riders. With that many riders, most of the teams should be represented, with the rotation smooth and fast, and you will be able to pick the best lines into the corner. This will also minimize the chance of being "gapped". Now if you are the rider that has missed the break and think you can make it across, you must do it as quickly as possible. Make a hard attack out of a corner and attempt to close the gap as quickly as possible. The less you're in "no man's land" the better.  If you succeed in closing the gap, take a brief moment to recover before taking pulls. The break shouldn't mind a couple of skipped rotations. This will mean added HP to the break and possibly another team that will not chase.  This doesn't mean sit on for 10 laps! You will only succeed in pissing off the break.  Everyone will have their own tactic once it gets closer to the end. If the break is certain to stay away and you get to the point of the race where there are only a few miles or laps left in the race, all bets are off!  Now it's time to race. I know we have all seen that stage in the Tour when the break starts to attack itself and riders are digging so deep that it hurts to watch. That kind of racing doesn't happen too often around here, but to a lesser degree it could. I have been that rider to start the attacking and put the hurt onto everyone, but have also been on the receiving end of those attacks - and it's not fun. The main thing for me is that I am part of the race, and to some point, am a factor on how it will shape the rest of the race. I have had my share of failures and have been dumped out of the winning break. I have also been the rider to have launched the attack at the right time and solo in for the win.

My point is that if you never try, you will never know.  You will lose more races and never win; no doubt about that, but there will be that one race where you pulled it off because you executed something you remember reading in this article. Being part of the break gives you an adrenaline rush that is hard to describe. Knowing that you are actually taking part and shaping the race will give you something that can not be replicated - experience. There are riders that have never been in a race winning break, there are some that are always there. From personal experience, the rush never gets old. One of my best races of the year was a race that I finished 4th out of a 4 man break. All I had to do was beat 1 rider and I would have been on the podium. I was capable of winning the race, but it was not my day and I was simply outclassed by 3 riders that were some of the best in the country.  I crossed the finish line and after my eyes uncrossed themselves, I started to get huge wave of relief wash over me because I raced as hard as I could that day and I was only good enough for 4th. I was satisfied with that. Not with just 4th place, but more because I was able to read and recognize what was happening in the race and made my move to join the break at a point where if I waited a second later, I might have not made it. I then remember the moment when the break of 8 split and I was on the back half of the split. I was the only rider to bridge to the leaders and it turned out to be the winning move in a NRC race. That was the experience of trying many times and having it finally work out for me.  Make it a goal to try something that you might not normally try like attack from the gun or try a solo move at the end of a race. Maybe even establish a breakaway or bridge across to a break. Go out there and have fun racing. Go out there and have fun racing your bike.

I'm not a coach, and this is just a simple guide of what I think is an easy way to work a break. I'm sure there are different opinions out there, and what works for one person, might not work for another. It's about finding the right combination and tweaking it to fit your style of racing. Besides, what do I know about riding a break anyway?

"Success is built on failure."

How to not attack like a wussy: Part 2 - How to "Turn the Screw"

[Attacking. It's the only way bike races are won, yet how and when to do it are among the most elusive skills. Unless you race for Battley Harley-Davidson, anyway. They pelt competitors from a ceaseless hail of attacks, as if the black skies opened up and into a torrential painstorm. They attack so hard that the course climbs into the sag wagon. They attack so fiercely that that Chuck Norris is rumored to be in negotiations with the team, offering to trade his roundhouse kick for their VO2 max. They attack while the early bird is dead asleep, and after the fat lady has sung.

This installment of Not Like a Wussy is attacked by three members of the Battley Harley-Davidson team: Chuck Hutcheson, Russ Langley and Dave Fuentes. See Part 1 here and Part 3 here.

How to not attack like a wussy
Part 2: How to "Turn the Screw"
by Russ Langley, Battley Harley-Davidson p/b Sonoma

What does the term turning the screws mean? To me it's the torturous pace that's set for the pure enjoyment of knowing whoever is on your wheel has been put into a world of pain. The goal isn't to drop someone - it's to crush their spirit. If you wanted to drop someone you would attack not like a wussy and be done with it. You want people sitting on your wheel thinking "how is it possible he's going this fast" and right when you've got em' on the ropes you up the pace.

It starts with the image which is part of the intimidation factor; you need a tough sounding nickname, for example "The Muscle". Don't go and give yourself a nickname because that's gay (no offense gay biker dude). You have to earn your nickname. Mine was given to me by Eddy Van Guise the announcer at the Super Week races eight or nine years ago "Russell The Muscle". Back then I was a bit stockier so the name was more appropriate. Over the years I've thinned down a bit so I'm not sure if it still applies (one year for Halloween I went as The Hulk but everyone thought I was sprout - ho ho ho Green Giant).

The next thing you have to work on is a really, really, really mean look. For me it was easy - I was born with a mean look. At times I look in the mirror and scare myself but then I remember I'm the muscle. As you work on your look you have to implicate it and you can do this in your daily life, the grocery store, at work or even at home with your family. You'll know when you've succeeded with the look because everyone will despise you, try to fight you, or you'll get called an a## h*** on a regular basis.

The last thing, and this one is optional, is a mean looking tattoo or tattoos. I say optional because tattoos are permanent and some of you will only perpetrate this image for a short period, others this is a life time goal and whole fully goes along with the hate and despair that we wake up to on a daily basis. Skulls, flames, daggers, animal like characters with horns are just a few options but highly recommended.

Now that you've got your image dialed in it's time to implicate the term and turn some screws. We'll use Chuck as an example as he was the last victim to this term and he's a good sport.

10 A.M. ride Saturday out of Rock Creek. Not a big group but a solid group of strong riders which is good in this case because it doesn't leave a lot of room for someone to hide. As we're rolling out Chuck and I are blabbing away, "yeah I'm pretty tired, yeah I'm somewhat injured, yeah I did the 7A.M"., all of these excuses although somewhat valid are part of the lamb to the slaughter. Chuck feeling comfort in the fact that we're both not 100 percent but we're still two of the stronger riders out there proceeded to jack up the pace at a point were it's usually fairly casual. Me I'm sitting second wheel in a nice comfortable spin waiting... waiting... and then I see a gap to the pack. This is where you start to turn the screws a bit, not by crushing it but by stretching it out with the guy you're with. Don't crush it yet, it's not time. What you're doing is staying in front of everyone else and making them chase; when they catch you they'll be gassed and you'll be ready to crush 'em.

At this point most of the guys are hesitant and not willing to pull through except for good ol' Chuck. Chuck and I are slogging away towards what most people think is a red light but I know it's about to change. We have a slight gap as most of the guys are taking a deep breath thinking they have a respite coming. The light turns green and I hit it, hard! Chuck was able to stay with me but couldn't pull through; this is when you turn around, no matter how much you're hurting, give a smile and up the pace. I dropped him on the down hill.

Now you're out front, what do you do? You go hard, not hard enough to blow yourself out, but hard enough to stay in front.

A few miles later, a few rollers later Chuck put in a big effort on a down hill to catch on. Knowing the ride is very important, so as soon as he caught on we made a right hand turn and started the hardest hill of the ride (he didn't know the route). This was were I wanted to make him bleed though his eyeballs. I put my head down and went as hard as I could (I hurt myself but I knew he was hurting more) and as I crested the top I looked back and could barely see him in the group behind. Unfortunately I didn't know he wasn't on my wheel so the effort I put in was somewhat in vain (a beautiful waste of energy).

At the half way point they caught me and I pulled through like it was no problem but I was hurting; show no pain. After the ride everyone is talking about where they cracked, where they dug deep, how they were just hanging on, you just sit there with the look of a Buddhist Monk and smile contently. The Muscle feels no pain, at least that's what you think.

How to not attack like a wussy: Part 1 - How to Attack the Basics

[Attacking. It's the only way bike races are won, yet how and when to do it are among the most elusive skills. Unless you race for Battley Harley-Davidson, anyway. They pelt competitors from a ceaseless hail of attacks, as if the black skies opened up and into a torrential painstorm. They attack so hard that the course climbs into the sag wagon. They attack so fiercely that that Chuck Norris is rumored to be in negotiations with the team, offering to trade his roundhouse kick for their VO2 max. They attack while the early bird is dead asleep, and after the fat lady has sung.

This installment of Not Like a Wussy is attacked by three members of the Battley Harley-Davidson team: Chuck Hutcheson, Russ Langley and Dave Fuentes. See Part 2 here and Part 3 here.]

How to not attack like a wussy
Part 1: How to Attack the Basics
by Chuck Hutcheson, Battley Harley-Davidson p/b Sonoma

I love to race my bike.  I enjoy the feeling I get when I accelerate away from the field and know full well that if anybody is on my wheel or chasing me, then they are hurting because I'm hurting like hell too.  Races are more fun and exciting when you are off the front by yourself or in a small group just suffering and driving the pace - and there is an angry chase happening behind you.   It feels great finishing by your self, or in a small group ahead of a shattered field.

To have a solid attack, there are several pre-requisites.  You must have good form/fitness, a quick acceleration, be comfortable with different levels of suffering, be able to recover quickly and, of course, have enough time-trialing ability to hold it to the end so all of your efforts are not in vain.

Your form should come from all of those long tempo rides you did in the winter and early spring.  Without going to much into ideals of training itself, I believe that after a complete recovery from the previous season, to be a successful racer, your body needs those long rides so that your not digging deep just to hang.  Hopefully you have the fitness when racing starts that no matter what the speed of the group you're just sitting in or rotating (with a purpose), comfortable bidding your time and waiting for a chance to launch.  Simply put, if you are red lined in the pack, you are not going off the front.

Acceleration is another key component to the attack.  If you can't pull away from the pack, you are going to end up towing it.  I'll jump close to my max sprinting effort and try to fly by everybody fast enough to discourage anyone from coming with me.  I like to practice this on group training rides, and sometimes if I get to far ahead, I will wait for the group and go again.

Bicycle racing is hard and you must be used to being out of you physical comfort zone.  I think a lot of racers who are really strong suck because as soon as they start hurting they let up.  Sitting in is easy, and going off the front is usually an exercise in suffering and excepting different levels of pain.  Many times, the best time to go off the front is when everybody, including you, is already hurting.  It may be single file, guys are cross eyed staring at the wheel ahead of them – then the lull – and POW! – Without even thinking you continue the effort, get a huge gap, and everyone behind you is looking at each other hoping someone else will chase – and you're gone.

I think one of the most important aspects to a successful attack is the ability to recover quickly.  Once you're done accelerating and you are settled into your tempo off the front, or your breakaway companion is still driving it after you just took a monster pull, you need to be able to recover enough to remain efficient and effective till the end of the race.  It is pointless to attack, get a gap off the front and then crack – although if this happens to someone else, it may be funny.  Again, this is where practicing on the group training rides, or doing intervals will help.  Note:  I do intervals differently than how I think most do.  I go out for only 20 minutes to a half hour and I'm done.  I stay close to threshold, accelerate to max effort – hold it, drop to threshold until I can go back to max again.  I do this for as many times as I can and for as long as I can.  Intervals like this make for a short ride, and may not work for everyone, but I feel they work great for me.

Finally, you need to have enough time trialing ability to get you to the line.  This ability goes hand and hand with form.  Once you're off the front, and possibly by yourself, you have to lay it all out there on the road – all the way to the line.  I never think about conserving anything in case I get caught, I think about conserving enough to get to the finish – even go negative and still be suffering after the race.  It's kind of a trial and error deal, where I have gone off the front so many times, in training and in races that I have a pretty good ideal of how hard I can drive the pace suffering in the red zone and almost blowing sky high.

How to not attend a training camp like a wussy

[This month in the Not like a wussy series is Jay Moglia of Route 1 Velo / Arrow Bicycle. A bicycle messenger, writer, musician, and inveterate competitor, Jay is a true warrior poet. You'll find no better wheels to follow than his, particularly when staring down some of West Virginia's most ruthless climbs surrouding Jay's Lost River Barn. If you're not fully motivated to train hard right now - and you wish you were - read the entire article, then quickly clear your schedule for the entire afternoon. The open road awaits.]

How to not attend a training camp like a wussy
by Jay Moglia, Route 1 Velo / Arrow Bicycle

Note:  this information is aimed toward racers and folks who like to call themselves racers, factoring in for the deep degrees of difficulty sacrifice and abandon implicit on the quest towards higher performance.  There is a paradox that as one builds their body’s strength, they also increase their body’s vulnerability, so leaning too hard to one side or the other is apt to snap the branch, while never delving across the spectrum will leave areas unused unexplored and thus unknown, or ripe for exploitation. It is obvious balance is desired, but less obvious how to lock it down and dial it in. 
                                    
I will present a few informal ideas or notions collected from years of doing my own training camps and more recently leading some of the top teams in the MABRA region on the challenging slopes of West Virginia at the Raw Talent Ranch.  Beside the enriching social and physical aspects incurred, it has been an education to see the wide range of operational modes.   The distance between what folks try to do, what they think they should do and what actually ends up transpiring.   
                                      
If you happen to be a serious recreational rider and come across this article take solace in knowing you can bypass much of the minutia and nit picking worry and simply do your thing--ride your bike, stay in shape and have fun--pretty much what all the racers SET OUT to do in the beginning!

Ok, here goes.....

1. EAT THE DAMN CHOCOLATES!

How to not run cross barriers like a wussy

[Kicking off the Not like a wussy series is Marc Vettori of C3-Sollay.com. Marc has been racing Cross for over 10 years and drinking Miller High Life even longer, often on the same day. Read more from Marc at fatmarc.blogspot.com.]

How to not run cross barriers like a wussy
by Marc Vettori, C3-Sollay.com

Recently I was contacted by GamJams.net to write a column about running through barriers. As I am not normally a contributor to gamjams I was honored and pretty excited to contribute something to this fine site. My name is Fatmarc, and I am a cyclocrosser.  Many would scoff at that statement. I have had many friends roadies and mountain bikers alike  question the logic of racing at a time of the year when the weather is nasty, cold, and really  not all that suited for bike racing at all. My answer to that is: exactly- that’s why it rules.

Cyclocross is arguably the most laden in tradition and experience requiring of any of discipline of racing. I have always looked at it as an art form. Pure fitness and ability to suffer are a premium, but the devil here is truly in the details, and learning the technique, the culture, the tire pressure can lead to winning your group in a cross race, or giving up 3 spots on the last lap of a race. Perhaps the best part of cross is that no matter where you are in the race, you are racing. There is certainly someone a few seconds in front of you, and certainly a couple of folks right behind you tearing their hearts out to chase you down.   

In writing this column, I am the first to admit, that I am no Jedi. That level is owned by folks in our region named Yozell, Winfield, Ferguson, Cline, Auer, and Shogren. I do however pay great attention and work hard to learn as much as I can, with any luck someday I might be a level two padwan. The information I am about to share is all gathered from the many good folks I have had teaching me over my past 10 years of cross racing.  It doesn’t mean that I employee it all the time, or that I am particularly good at it, just that  I’ve seen folks do it right.

With that table set allow me to get to task at hand: how to run barriers and not look like a wussy.

First to learn is the dismount. There are two basic dismounts: the step though and the wrap around. Years ago the step through was the way to go. Courses then had many high speed barriers, and flowing from bike to run was key. With recent UCI /USCF rules limiting the number of barriers on the course, promoters have been forced to really use the venue to create interesting courses, and in many cases downright evil barrier placement.  Although barriers are fun to watch, if you only get one or two sets, placing them in a middle of a field is not nearly as much fun or evil as placing them on a corner or hill, forcing carnage, and causing technically challenged riders fits. For this reason the wrap around dismount is much more prevalent  now  and frankly easier to learn. I won’t try to walk you through the steps here, there are many good people leading clinics and practices across the region who will be much more effective at that  than I can do here. (See Marc Gwadz, Rob Campbell, Sven Nystrom, Kris Auer, Kelly Cline and Tom McDaniel to name a few.)

Okay now you are off your bike and running towards the barriers.

What do you do? first thing is to realize you are going to have to pick up your bike. The best option is to have two points of contact and keep control of your bike. It’s always ugly to watch someone try to run barriers with one hand on the bike.  Remember two hands on the bike.  If “suit casing the bike” one hand  on the bars, one on the top tube. Grabbing the seat is always a bad idea. The other viable option is to shoulder the bike. Always remember  to control the front end,  when running with the bike.  Running with an out of control bike on your shoulder will result in sloppy technique and likely have you throwing your bike to the ground at some point, if not spiking yourself.

Wes Schemph shows off his suit casing form over the barriers at AVC's Breast Cancer Awareness Cross in Hagerstown last weekend. (photo courtesy of Les Doerfler / Downward Dog Photography)

Running the barriers. This will take a little practice, with exception of my short friends, 5”3’ or less, the barriers, UCI legal height of 16 inches, should not be high hurdles. Many will go through the barriers as if running hurdles and jump into the air over them, again unless you are 5”3’ or less focus on running through the barriers not hopping over them. Crossers run barriers, the Easter bunny hops through them.

Running the barriers  takes practice, and lots of it. I should advise that you may hit your shins on the barriers learning this. It hurts a little, but you get cool scars. Remember the closer to the barriers you dismount, the less time you have to run. The best folks I have seen do this regionally are Ryan Leech, Ethan Townsend, Rick Mihills and Kelly Cline. Kelly Cline is butter through the barriers.

Okay now you are on the other side of the barriers, gently set your bike back on the ground. I’ll repeat, gently set your bike on the ground, too often this is when oxygen debt takes over and much like the quarterback spiking the ball, you’ll see people throw their bikes back down. Once I threw my bike down so hard that the knocked the chain off. It was not pretty.

So we are through the barriers, the bike is on the ground and we need to get back on here. Proper technique would dictate that you step back on to the bike, sliding your inner thigh across the saddle and smoothly remounting and engaging the pedals.  The best at this will fluidly remount without dabbing their trail foot or bobbling.

Sadly,  I have developed the incorrect habit of launching myself back on to the bike. I will often find myself jumping in the air landing on my inner thigh, and clipping back in. This technique is used by many, and frankly while not technically correct, works pretty well, aside from being technically wrong.

At its worst two bad things can happen. At Charm City 2 years I essentially jumped over my bike on the last lap, last set of barriers. It was really ugly, but not the worst. The worst is when you jump into the air and as you are basically only hanging on the bars at this point and have little control over the body, as gravity delivers a Jimmy Snuka style shot to your crotch.. Nothing is worse than fighting along at oxygen debt, feeling as though you are bleeding out of your eyes, and then pounding yourself in the crotch.  If anyone has experienced this, it’s just ugly, not the kind of pain I would wish on my worst enemies.  My recommendation would be to learn proper technique, as re-learning proper technique can be a real challenge. From a re-mount standpoint, I am not successful at it yet.

In closing, I would say that perhaps the best part of cross is the community, and the folks in the game willing to share their knowledge with other riders. With a few cross seasons under my belt, I am always looking to learn more, improve technique and become a more complete cross rider.  If you are interested in becoming a better cross rider I would strongly recommend that you hook up with one of the many cross practices in the region. I’d also recommend hagging around or working pit during a race. You’d be amazed what you can learn from a set up, tire pressure, strategy standpoint in the pits. Best to you, thanks for reading. If there’s any questions you may have, feel free to drop me a line in the comments.

--

Want to contribute your own article on how to not do something like a wussy? Have your people talk to our people.

Not like a wussy

"Like a pro."

That would be nice to hear, wouldn't it?

"You look like a pro in those socks."
"You bridged to that breakaway perfectly - like a pro."
"Man, you cleaned that gnarly stretch of singletrack like a pro."
"Awesome nature break, dude - totally pro."

I've said before that cycling is nothing if not aspirational. And aspiring to be "pro" (whatever that means to each of us) probably governs much of what we do in this sport, and how we do it. But I'm also an advocate of setting achievable near-term goals, and of not taking ourselves too seriously when we don't achieve them (and particularly when we do).

So this week launches the new GamJams Racing Curriculum Series, written exclusively by racers for racers. Dubbed "Not like a Wussy," the series examines all aspects of bike racing, with the primary objective of making you faster, and the secondary objective of keeping you from looking like you don't know what you're doing.

Why is it important to do something not like a wussy? In bike racing, confidence is king. Training makes you faster, but confidence lets you use your fast when you need it. And let's face it - the only thing worse than losing is looking like a loser. This is a sport where style is as important as speed, and where we measure our success not just in podiums, but in panache.

So here is what you've got to look forward to over the next few months. Part of it anyway. If you have a topic you're an expert on and want to contribute, let me know.

Not Like a Wussy Publishing Schedule:

How to not run cross barriers like a wussy (Oct 08)
Marc Vettori, C3-Sollay.com

How to not attend a training camp like a wussy (Nov 08)
Jay Moglia, Route 1 Velo / Arrow Bicycle

How to not ride an indoor trainer workout like a wussy (Dec 08)
Joshua Goyet, Virginia Beach Wheelmen

How to not do a group ride like a wussy (Jan 09)
Jesse Liefert, Route 1 Velo / Arrow Bicycle

How to not launch an attack like a wussy (Feb 09)
Chuck Hutcheson, Battley Harley-Davidson / Sonoma

How to not write a race report like a wussy (Mar 09)
Mike May, Artemis

How to not corner like a wussy (Apr 09)
Jared Nieters, Haymarket Bicycles p/b Function Drinks